Whether or not you have been recently widowed, divorced or separated from the mother of your children under difference circumstances, it doesn’t matter. The results are still the same. You are now a single dad with all of the responsibilities that go with that title, and there are quite a few.

First and foremost, you have to address the needs of the kids. However you’ve become a single dad is sure to have been a traumatic experience for your children. It’s important to address that trauma with open communication. Don’t wait for your kids to come to you, go to them. Make sure your kids know that they are safe and loved and that you are in control.

Next, you have to address your own needs. It’s easy to get caught up in taking care of your kids, but the best gift you can give your kids is a happy, healthy dad. Schedule personal time for yourself to exercise, read, hang out with your friends or just be on your own. If there’s mourning to do, do it.

Finally, you have to create and maintain as stable home environment for your kids. Get them to pitch in on the chores, and make a household schedule so that you know where everyone is supposed to be and when.  The sooner you get on the schedule, the sooner you will establish a sense of normalcy.

Remember, getting a household to run smoothly with just one parent doesn’t happen overnight, so give yourself room to make mistakes.

And, don’t be afraid to ask for help. It’s parenthood, not directions.